damnation

I have let the words spill from my lips,
let the confessions ring loud and bold,
and I should have done neither.
my love was genuine, sure, and loud.
our kisses unique, baiting, and breath taking.

..and then.

damn me. damn me and my too-soon iloveyou’s.
and I have been, oh I have;
this damnation wrapping me in obligations I should never feel obligated to fulfill.
this damnation, holding fast to my inhibitions so I may not breathe,
much less exercise the voracity of my emotions.. however fretful they may be.
this damnation, chafing my wrists like a pair of cuffs, my ankles like shackles.
and this damnation, leaving me wordless, with a ring on my finger and a future–
a future filled with a sense of duty, occasional truth, half-hearted scorn, and moments..
fleeting moments in which my sensibilities grasp the faintest influx of true love.
those moments alone will sustain.
those moments alone will help me survive, in this damnation.